Solo: A Star Wars Plot Summary

No, we still don’t have a trailer for the new Star Wars anthology movie coming out in May.

No, we still don’t have any official look at the new Han Solo or Lando Calrissian in costume, besides a leaked German merchandising calendar.

No, we still don’t know if the movie’s release day is getting pushed, after the announcement of Deadpool 2’s altered opening weekend.

No, we don’t yet understand if Ron Howard will be narrating the entirety of the runtime (a fan theory I am sincerely hoping comes true.)

But what we do know … is a very, very basic plot of the new movie.

Board the Millennium Falcon and journey to a galaxy far, far away in Solo: A Star Wars Story, an all-new adventure with the most beloved scoundrel in the galaxy. Through a series of daring escapades deep within a dark and dangerous criminal underworld, Han Solo meets his mighty future copilot Chewbacca and encounters the notorious gambler Lando Calrissian, in a journey that will set the course of one of the Star Wars saga’s most unlikely heroes. – StarWars.com

Wow. Definitely a lot of stuff we definitely didn’t know before. I apologize for the snark but, the closer we get to the movie’s release, the more anxious I get. And, well, mixing anxiety with my hopes and dreams for a young Han Solo movie is not a good combination. Just have Harrison Ford read the A.C. Crispin trilogy out loud for two-and-a-half-hours.

Let’s all say a prayer and look at blurry Lego set pictures together.